BeThatHealingGirl Podcast

What a Secure Relationship Actually Looks Like (even if it feels weird)

If slow feels boring, if calm feels confusing, and if your nervous system is low-key addicted to chaos.... this one’s for you.
This week, we’re diving into what a secure relationship actually looks and feels like (even if your anxious attachment says, “Wait, is this it?”). Whether you’re dating, in a long-term partnership, or healing from relationship patterns that feel more like rollercoasters than real connection, I’m breaking down the 6 big shifts that define secure love.
✨ Spoiler alert: It’s not fast, intense, or dramatic. It’s steady. Consistent. Intentional. And deeply healing (even if your brain wants to sprint toward a vibe check).
We’re talking:
• Why moving fast ≠ connection
• How to tell if you’re chasing intensity instead of sincerity
• What “repair” looks like vs. reaction
• And why secure love might feel… weird (at first)
Plus, I’m sharing an honest question from one of my Healing Girl Gang members going through a painful breakup, and offering the truth we all need when we want to hold on instead of letting go. Let’s unlearn the chaos and relearn calm love, together.
🖐 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and rate 5 stars—it helps keep this podcast free and gives me a virtual high five from your earbuds 💕
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Anxious attached with an Avoidant - Becoming Secure Together (Special Anniversary Episode!)

It’s our 6-year wedding anniversary (!!) and today I brought my husband Craig on the podcast for the realest conversation about love, growth, and the journey from spiraling to secure.
We’re answering your juiciest Qs:
✨ What it’s really like when anxious meets avoidant
✨ Our proposal story (yes, there was a backup plan involving a dog)
✨ How we almost didn’t make it—and what shifted
✨ Craig’s honest take on what helped him finally “grow up” emotionally
✨ Plus: our chaotic traits, icks, inside jokes, and a BIG announcement (no, not a baby)
Whether you’re deep in your healing era or just curious about what it looks like to actually do this work with a partner, this episode is for you. It’s honest. It’s sweet. It’s full of growth and some light roasting (Just the way we like it!)
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Why You Think Its Your Fault in the Relationship (even when its not)

Still Needing Constant Reassurance in Your Relationship? Here’s Why 👀 . This episode is for the anxious girlies who look like they have it all together … but on the inside, you’re checking the vibes like it’s your full-time job.
We’re talking:
✨ Why your brain craves constant reassurance—and how to stop needing it
✨ The connection between high achievement & emotional hypervigilance
✨ How to build real self-trust (the kind that doesn’t care if he texts back in 5 min or 5 hours)
PLUS: I’m sharing a few of the funniest icks from my DMs (and you will scream at one of them)
😂 If you're secretly struggling in a relationship that "should" feel safe, you're not crazy and you're definitely not alone. This episode will help you shift from spiraling to self-secure.
💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG This month inside the Girl Gang, we’re doing a full detox of overthinking + learning exactly how to soothe yourself without needing 24/7 validation from your partner. Want in? DM me “GIRLGANG” on IG or click the link below.
🖐 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and rate 5 stars—it helps keep this podcast free and gives me a virtual high five from your earbuds 💕
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube

How To Stop Needing Constant Reassurance

This episode is for the anxious girlies who look like they have it all together (you’ve got degrees, deadlines, and the job)… but on the inside, you’re checking the relationship vibes like it’s your full-time job.
We’re talking:
✨ Why your brain craves constant reassurance and how to stop needing it
✨ The connection between high achievement & emotional hyper-vigilance
✨ How to build real self-trust (the kind that doesn’t care if he texts back in 5 min or 5 hours)
PLUS: I’m sharing a few of the funniest icks from the TickerTocker (and you will scream at one of them) 😂 If you're secretly struggling in a relationship that "should" feel safe, you're not crazy and you're definitely not alone. This episode will help you shift from spiraling to self-secure.
💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG
This month inside the Girl Gang, we’re doing a full detox of overthinking + learning exactly how to soothe yourself without needing 24/7 validation from your partner. Want in? DM me “GIRLGANG” on IG! 
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube

3 Reasons Why Your Anxious Attachment Isn't Healing

We’re unpacking the 3 big reasons your anxious attachment isn’t healing, even if you’re doing everything “right.” Spoiler: it’s not about trying harder… it’s about trying differently.
If you’re a high-achieving, self-aware, anxious girlie who still feels like a walking red flag in relationships, this one’s for you.
We’re talking:
✨ Why performing yur healing is keeping you stuck
✨ The myth of linear progress (and why healing is actually a spiral staircase
✨ How to stop overwatering the plant and just let it grow 🪴
Plus, I’m sharing a wild story from the internet girlie streets (hi, Wizard Liz 👀) that proves you can be a literal goddess and still get ghosted, cheated on, or confused AF in love.
💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG If you’re ready to actually break the anxious cycle and learn to feel safe in your body (not just in theory), come hang with us inside the Girl Gang. Monthly deep dives, nervous system rituals, and a no-perfection zone.
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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How She Went From Overthinking Everything to Feeling Secure in Love

Ever wonder what it actually looks like to go from anxious, overthinking, “I’m probably the problem” energy… to grounded, confident, and finally feeling secure in your relationship?
In this raw and heart-hitting episode, I’m sitting down with one of my 1:1 coaching client, a high-achieving, military-working, nurse-extraordinaire, who decided to stop spiraling overseas (literally!) and finally heal for real.
We’re talking:💭 Overthinking and the "doom scroll" inside your own brain💌 How your childhood wounds sneak into adult relationships📲 Why waiting on a text back used to ruin her day — and what’s changed💥 The difference between self-help and actual transformation🌊 And how she learned to communicate without blowing things up
Plus: what made her go from “I can fix this on my own” to “I need deeper support”… and how that shift changed everything.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re “too much,” like you’re self-sabotaging something good, or like your brain just won’t stop spinning…this episode is for you.
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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5-Minute Pep Talk: For When Your Relationship Overthinking Kicks In

Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl podcast! If your mind is spiraling, your stomach’s in knots, and you’ve refreshed your texts 18 times in the last 3 minutes… this episode is your emergency toolkit! In this quick but powerful 5-minute pep talk, I’m giving you grounding reminders to come back home to yourself when your anxious attachment gets triggered.
This is the episode to save, download, share with your bestie, and play on repeat when you're about to spiral.
You’ll learn:
✨ Why your anxiety makes sense (and why you’re not broken)
✨ How to regulate your nervous system in the moment
✨ A powerful breathing practice to calm your body
✨ How to shift your energy back to YOU instead of chasing
✨ Loving prompts to re-center and choose yourself first
If you’re new here, I’m Clare, a relationship coach for high-achieving girlies who crush it at work but feel lost, anxious, or overthink-y in love. You're not alone, and you are SO not broken.
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
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WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
 
 

Reminders For When You Have Your Anxious Attachment Triggered

Ever find yourself refreshing your texts like your life depends on it? Or spending 10 hours doing two hours of work because your brain won’t stop obsessing over that thing you said? Yep. This one’s for you, bb!
In this episode, I’m giving you powerful (and surprisingly calming) reminders for when your anxious attachment kicks in HARD. Whether you're deep in a spiral or just know one is brewing, these are the things I wish someone had told me when I was riding the relationship-anxiety rollercoaster daily.
We're talking:
- The difference between urgency and truth (spoiler: they are not the same)
- Why “if it feels hysteric, it’s historic” is your new healing mantra
- The cold hard truth: you cannot out-logic your nervous system (sorry to my high-achieving girlies with 3 degrees and a color-coded Google calendar)
Plus: a little gut health update (yes, your anxiety might be coming from your stomach), a hilarious “Would You Rather” game you’re gonna want to bring to your next girls’ night, and a juicy Q&A from inside the Healing Girl Gang!
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
 

How To Stop Self-Silencing and Express Your Feelings (without the spiral)

Ever held it in like a champ… until you exploded over something small (but actually not small at all)? 🙃You didn’t want to ruin the vibe. It was the weekend. You were on vacation.You told yourself “It’s fine” five times in your head and then snapped over the way they chewed.
Yup. This one’s for you, babe.
In this weeks episode , we’re talking:
How to stop self-silencing (aka white-knuckling your way through feelings 😬)
Why holding it in isn’t keeping the peace (spoiler: it’s brewing a low-key emotional bomb)
What healthy, non-spiraly expression actually looks like
And how your perfectionism might secretly be killing your communication
If you’ve ever said “it’s not a big deal” when it 100% was a big deal — I got you.
✨ Also — the Healing Girl Gang is diving deep into communication this month. We’ve got the live training, the action steps, the process, the coaching... the whole damn toolkit. 
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
 
 

Why You Keep Overexplaining (and Still Feel Misunderstood)

Why do we keep explaining... and explaining... and explaining — and still walk away feeling misunderstood (and kind of embarrassed)? 😵‍💫
In this week's episode we’re diving into why overexplaining is so common for high-achieving, anxious-attached girlies — and why it actually makes you feel less secure (not more).
We’ll talk about:
- How overexplaining is really a nervous system response (not just “bad communication”)
- Why your anxious attachment thrives on overexplaining (and how to gently stop)
- The difference between clarifying vs. oversharing
- Simple, real-world tools to feel heard without feeling like you’re doing a TED Talk at your boyfriend 🚩
If you’re ready to stop feeling like you need a PowerPoint presentation to get your needs met, you’re in the right place. 😌✨
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 
💖JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG!💖
🔥CONFIDENCE CODE 💕
FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube
WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session